WANTED

“WANTED” (James McAvoy, Angelina Jolie & Morgan Freeman)
I’ll tell you one thing I don’t ‘WANT’ – is to ever have to sit thru this piece of garbage again! “Wanted” is a candidate for the Ten Worst movies list – it absolutely sucks & yet again, I have to wonder what led the 3 lead actors to take on these idiotic roles in this idiotic film...
It starts off very promising actually, Wesley (McAvoy) plays a sniffling, cowardly office worker who despises his overweight condescending female boss & has a snide jerk as a best friend, whom he suspects of having sex with his girlfriend & still does nothing about it (& the jerk IS doing his girlfriend almost daily)
The movie shows some spark when Wesley finally decides enough is enough & dumps his old life for a shot at an adventurous one when he discovers his father, thought long dead, was actually one of the world’s best paid assassins who was recently killed by a ‘rogue’ paid assassin who jumped ship from the ‘good guy group’ of paid assassins to go solo & kill off the good guy group one at a time...
Wesley is tortured while learning how to do things the way his father did so he can become the ultimate paid assassin & bump off the renegade paid assassin that whacked his father. Bullets are shot from miles away & hit their targets with such piercing blows that they enter the back of their victim’s skull & exit thru their foreheads (In super slow-motion with realistic blood splattering accuracy!)
Then there’s the ‘awesome’ multiple scenes of ‘bullet bending’ – Since Wesley’s father knew how to make a bullet ‘bend’ around an obstacle & then get back on the correct path to hit its target, then ‘Junior’ must be able to do it as well! Sure, that makes sense, doesn’t it? I mean, my dad once bowled a 299 game, so I obviously should be able to do the same, right? Well, no, I never cared for bowling all that much, I think I rolled a 222 once... but IF I had a team of paid professional bowlers show me how to bend the ball so it hit the pocket every time, I’d surely be able to match the old man’s high score!
All I’ll say is that the 10-11 year olds in the theatre absolutely loved this ‘kiddy’ movie.
“I want to see it again!” one squealed afterward. Though R-Rated, the crowd was inundated with early-&-pre-teen children who giggled loudly at every curse word & ooo’d when Angelina Jolie’s bare butt was shown (Then they giggled after ooo-ing)
So if you’re the type who giggles & ooo’s at the sight of slow motion bullets that travel like heat seeking missiles even though they’re shot from standard revolvers, you’ll love “Wanted”... & let us not forget the ‘wicked’ car chase scenes – that’s one gimmick I’ll never get tired of... Oh, did I forget to mention? This is the second time in my life that I actually fell asleep during a movie - & when I woke up, the chase scene was still going on!