KUNG FU PANDA

“KUNG FU PANDA” (Voices of Jack Black, Dustin Hoffman & Angelina Jolie)

Your worst fears are realized at the closing credits – Yes, they do sing “Kung Fu Fighting” over the credits (Run quickly from the theater as soon as the screen goes black!)
I don’t know why I went to see this; I hate martial arts movies – what made me think I’d like an animated one? Well, there was that ‘Surfing Penguins’ movie that wasn’t half bad & I’ve never surfed in my life either...
I guess I thought it would have some funny lines (there are a few, but they’re sparse)
I didn’t think it would have countless ‘serious’ cartoon Kung Fu fights, to which my wife pointed out, “It’s called KUNG FU Panda & you didn’t expect to see any Kung Fu-ing going on?”
Then, of course there are the children... & the parents of the children who bring them into my theater & don’t seem to care if they bawl, talk loudly or run up & down the stairs throughout the entire movie as long as they bug everyone else & NOT THEM... That always adds to my enjoyment of an animated feature...
If you’re interested in seeing this & I haven’t helped you decide, well, let me try to remedy that – Jack Black voices Po, an overweight Panda whose Goose father wants him
to follow in his footsteps & sell noodles. Po’s lone interest is the Fab Five – China’s greatest Kung Fu-ists & finding out which will be selected as ‘Dragon Master’ & take on the dreaded Snow Leopard that has vowed to return to the city & conquer his one-time master Shi-fu (Voiced by Dustin Hoffman)
A sage old turtle shocks everyone by proclaiming the slow (& slow-witted) Po as the Dragon Master – destined to save the world from Tai Lung (Ian McShane as the Snow Leopard)
So Shi-fu is forced to attempt to train the useless Panda to become a Kung Fu expert in just a matter of days...
I don’t know if it was the fact that the Fab 5 consisted of a Praying Mantis, a Crane, a Monkey & a Viper (Along with the sexy ‘Tigress’ voiced by Angelina Jolie) or if it was simply due to the fact that it just wasn’t very funny – it took itself way too seriously at times! But I can’t recommend ‘Kung Fu Panda’ to anyone. Unless you’ve really been dying to see an animated martial arts film showing a Praying Mantis & a Crane performing acts of Kung Fu-ism...